Surprise! PLUS BREAKING NEWS...

We're not even through the first week of 2010 and the new year is already full of surprises...

Like this surprise! - BREAKING NEWS - LATE ADDITION TO THE BLISS INDEX: It appears that U.S. Senator Chris Dodd (D-Conn) will retire. This story will continue to develop...

Pop quiz: Which media organization is asking Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Alcatraz) and Sen. Harry Reid (D-Casinos) to open Congress’ planned non-televised behind the scenes "health care reform" talks? Is it, a.) the New York Times; b.) NBC; c.) NPR; or d. ) SURPRISE! the Congressionally created C-SPAN?!?! (If you picked “d,” you win.)


I am surprised Madame Speaker turned on the president…

“In a huge surprise, Sen. Byron Dorgan (D-N.D.) has just announced he will not seek reelection.” In a totally unrelated surprise, news organizations will soon have something special to tell us about Sen. Dorgan.


Say goodnight, Mr. Senator...

Add Democrats: to some, it's a surprise that they’re “dropping like flies.”

In a decision that totally surprised the Kennedy Royal Family, the Obama Administration “signaled a sudden urgency yesterday to resolve the nine-year dispute over building a wind farm off Cape Cod.” Teddy Kennedy (yes, that guy who helped bring President Barack Obama along) and his family – not to mention Native Americans in the area – fought tooth and nail to make sure the giant windmills didn’t sully the rich folks’ view from Cape Cahd. Note to the rest of you poor suckers across the fruited plains: wind farms are coming to a vista near you, like it or not.


With scenery like that, it's no wonder Teddy and the rest of the Cape Cod Sopranos fought to keep the coast clear of unsightly structures...

Senator John McCain (R-AARP) might very well be on his way to his long-deserved retirement. Considering the manner in which he ran against an empty suit – and lost – is it any surprise?


Stop thinking about the Senate dining room and start thinking about the early bird special at Hometown Buffet...

I don’t think anyone should be surprised that Iran doesn’t want Sen. John Kerry (D-Gigolo) to visit…whether he comes on a swift boat or jet.


Senator John Kerry being swiftboarded...

Frankly, I’m surprised that theBrits – considering the short shrift they’ve been given by the current administration – tried to help when it came to the Christmas Crotch Bomber. I’m sure they were warmly thanked…not.

George W. Bush is going to be so surprised when he finds out he’s up against the Democrats again in the coming elections. (Then again, maybe not.)

Add Democrats and the next election: Why are they taking that approach? According the Wall Street Journal’s John Fund, “How worried are Democrats about the mid-term voting only 10 months away? "If the election were held today, we'd lose the House," Democratic campaign consultant Tom King told the Huffington Post this week, expressing a view that HuffPo says is echoed by a number of Democratic strategists in off-the-record conversations.” Considering what's come out of Washington, D.C., this past year (and what hasn't), no one should be surprised.

How much would you fork over to see the look of surprise when one of these flies up the robes of a bin Laden buddy? This is one of those projects that makes me feel extra good about being a taxpayer.


Hey, OBL...how about a surprise party?

Don't you just love surprises?